For the past 6 months, Ruby has been sharing our room, but tonight, for the first time, she is sleeping in her own room. MY bedroom is no longer RUBY's room, and its made me realise just how much I have missed it. I don't have to creep into bed to avoid waking her up, and have been able to potter around in the room enjoying making it mine again. I have reclaimed the space.
It was this act of reclaiming the space that has cemented my choice for my word of the year for 2010. Yep, my word for 2010 is going to be.....
SPACE
This word has lots of meanings in terms of my focus for next year. Firstly, its about the space I live in. Having Ruby has made me want to create a home for her which she loves, and that is a creative, calm, inspiring, homely and happy place. I look around my flat, and it is not quite how I want it, so this year I am going to be thinking a lot about the environment I live in. Its going to be about doing all those tasks around the home that I never seem to make time for, like recycling/ebay-ing/charity shopping all those old clothes that fester in my wardrobe, sorting out the stuff under my bed (GULP!), surrounding myself with artwork and things to look at that inspire me, and generally making my home a nicer place for me and my family to live.
Secondly, I'm going to be focusing on my studio space. I found out this week that one of the girls who recently moved into my space no longer wants it, so I am now going to be having a much bigger space to work in. As I mentioned in a previous post, my studio space has never really worked for me. Therefore, I am going to spend time this coming year working out how best I can use the space and then turning it into the kind of environment that DOES work for me and that makes me want to hang out up there more often. I know if I can get the space right, then my work and ideas will take flight and flourish.
Thirdly, it leads on from my word of the year last year, which was KAREN! I wanted to make sure I didn't lose sight of myself in the process of becoming a mama, and I want to continue to make space for myself. Space to think, space to paint, space to be entirely on my own at times, and space to connect with what is important to me.
I have spent the last few weeks pondering what my word would be, and I really feel like the word SPACE fits perfectly with where my head is at.
I am REALLY excited about what next year holds.
Tuesday, 15 December 2009
Sunday, 29 November 2009
Textiles, textiles,textiles....
Three times for emphasis....
Its funny the way the universe conspires to bring things to fruition.....
A while back, I wrote a post about how I wanted to incorporate more textiles into my artwork. I end up trying to create texture using paint, so why not throw in the real thing, and all that?! And then in the last week, two things occur that bring these thought back to the front of my brain.
The first thing is finding out about a new "Stitch and Bitch" group that is starting up at 'Loves' cafe bar in Weston. Now, I'm rubbish at knitting, but its an opportunity to meet with other creative people in my home town, and drink tea. Whats not to like?! And anyways, I am thinking of trying a bit of sewing/general mucking about with embroidery and textiles instead. I would like to learn to knit, but as I also need to Bring Ms Ruby with me to this group, it might be better to work on something that doesn't require tons of concentration.... mind you, I'm not really sure there is ANYTHING I will be able to do one handed if Rubester is not in the mood to rock and roll about on the floor..... hmmmm, except perhaps drink tea and eat toast?
SO! My brain has been ticking all weekend on all things knitting/textile/material/embroidery related, and then I find a message in my inbox from Laura Crouch Collins, an old friend of mine who lives in America, and makes the most amazing bags, one of which I am lucky enough to own....
Anyways..... she is interested in working with me to design some fabric for her Spring/Summer collection of bags for 2010! I am THRILLED at this prospect, especially as she will be paying me in handbags if the project comes off. WOOOOO!
Now I am really buzzing on all things textile, to the point where I am having trouble sleeping due to all the ideas flying round my head. (SIGH! This side effect of having a creative brain just doesn't mix with having a baba that likes to get up LOTS of times in the night for midnight feasts.....)
Here are a few images that excite me....
Made by Lupin Kind of remind me of some of my paintings, and I LOVE all the colours....
From 'Love Stitching Art'
And is it sad that this photo makes my heart beat a little faster? (And yes, I did end up buying some felt.....)
.jpg)
Its funny the way the universe conspires to bring things to fruition.....
A while back, I wrote a post about how I wanted to incorporate more textiles into my artwork. I end up trying to create texture using paint, so why not throw in the real thing, and all that?! And then in the last week, two things occur that bring these thought back to the front of my brain.
The first thing is finding out about a new "Stitch and Bitch" group that is starting up at 'Loves' cafe bar in Weston. Now, I'm rubbish at knitting, but its an opportunity to meet with other creative people in my home town, and drink tea. Whats not to like?! And anyways, I am thinking of trying a bit of sewing/general mucking about with embroidery and textiles instead. I would like to learn to knit, but as I also need to Bring Ms Ruby with me to this group, it might be better to work on something that doesn't require tons of concentration.... mind you, I'm not really sure there is ANYTHING I will be able to do one handed if Rubester is not in the mood to rock and roll about on the floor..... hmmmm, except perhaps drink tea and eat toast?
SO! My brain has been ticking all weekend on all things knitting/textile/material/embroidery related, and then I find a message in my inbox from Laura Crouch Collins, an old friend of mine who lives in America, and makes the most amazing bags, one of which I am lucky enough to own....
Anyways..... she is interested in working with me to design some fabric for her Spring/Summer collection of bags for 2010! I am THRILLED at this prospect, especially as she will be paying me in handbags if the project comes off. WOOOOO!
Now I am really buzzing on all things textile, to the point where I am having trouble sleeping due to all the ideas flying round my head. (SIGH! This side effect of having a creative brain just doesn't mix with having a baba that likes to get up LOTS of times in the night for midnight feasts.....)
Here are a few images that excite me....
Made by Lupin Kind of remind me of some of my paintings, and I LOVE all the colours....
From 'Love Stitching Art'
And is it sad that this photo makes my heart beat a little faster? (And yes, I did end up buying some felt.....)
.jpg)
Thursday, 26 November 2009
Confessional
Sigh..... where are all the months going?
Yup, its been ages since I last posted.Summer has well and truely left us, and I'm afraid I can't pretend it is Autumn either. It is cold, wet and pretty miserable, and I am mourning the loss of my long walks with The Rubester every day. (although we still walk, it has to be said, we just end up getting a little soggier.)
This is going to be a post where I am most honest with myself and own up to something that has been becoming increasingly more obvious to me recently. I have had a stark realisation that I have outgrown my studio down at The Quarry. If I am honest, I probably outgrew it on the day I moved into it. Since having "T.R", I have been buzzing with new ideas and creative thoughts, despite having little time to realise them. And being flooded with inspiration has made me realise that I have probably not created anything truely new since working at The Quarry. I have spent lots of time procrastinating by finishing off old work and reworking stuff, rather than following any new paths. Because of this, my practice up there feels pretty stale.
I think there are a number of things that have contributed to this feeling. For a start, the space is too small. Secondly, much as I have enjoyed and been challenged by having a studio that is occasionally open to the public, I have found it equally stiifling. I have struggled to let go of myself and go a bit wild and experiemental. When I had my room at home I could really go for it without fear of being judged. Ok, so the work wasn't always good, but it was freer and I could be much less inhibited.
It feels like time to move on, I'm just not sure where to yet. My ideal would be to have a big old studio at the bottom of my garden I could retreat to, occasionlly get drunk in and paint away to my hearts content. Sadly, in a flat with no garden, this is not really an option!
I'm not really sure what the solution is, but to have acknowledged this feels like the first step to finding it.....
Yup, its been ages since I last posted.Summer has well and truely left us, and I'm afraid I can't pretend it is Autumn either. It is cold, wet and pretty miserable, and I am mourning the loss of my long walks with The Rubester every day. (although we still walk, it has to be said, we just end up getting a little soggier.)
This is going to be a post where I am most honest with myself and own up to something that has been becoming increasingly more obvious to me recently. I have had a stark realisation that I have outgrown my studio down at The Quarry. If I am honest, I probably outgrew it on the day I moved into it. Since having "T.R", I have been buzzing with new ideas and creative thoughts, despite having little time to realise them. And being flooded with inspiration has made me realise that I have probably not created anything truely new since working at The Quarry. I have spent lots of time procrastinating by finishing off old work and reworking stuff, rather than following any new paths. Because of this, my practice up there feels pretty stale.
I think there are a number of things that have contributed to this feeling. For a start, the space is too small. Secondly, much as I have enjoyed and been challenged by having a studio that is occasionally open to the public, I have found it equally stiifling. I have struggled to let go of myself and go a bit wild and experiemental. When I had my room at home I could really go for it without fear of being judged. Ok, so the work wasn't always good, but it was freer and I could be much less inhibited.
It feels like time to move on, I'm just not sure where to yet. My ideal would be to have a big old studio at the bottom of my garden I could retreat to, occasionlly get drunk in and paint away to my hearts content. Sadly, in a flat with no garden, this is not really an option!
I'm not really sure what the solution is, but to have acknowledged this feels like the first step to finding it.....
Tuesday, 22 September 2009
Weston Arts Festival
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Last weekend was the beginning of the Weston-super-Mare Arts Festival 2009. I was (kind of) involved up at The Quarry as there was an open day with Open Studios and a sculpture trail, but to be honest, it was such a nice day that I spent most of it outside in the sunshine! But I did take Ruby on her first sculpture trail. (although I CAN'T WAIT to take her to see the sculptures at Broomhill)
There are lots of exciting things happening in my hometown art wise over the duration of the festival. On my birthday, I went to meet Camilla at The Mythical Beast Sweet Shoppe. It was lovely to meet her, and, as she wrote on her blog, I too hope we can meet in the not too distant future to drink tea and talk all things art related!
I also met a lovely fellow artist called Becky. Becky runs a little boutique shop in Weston called Frou Frou where another little slice of arts week was taking place. I loved what was happening here. Sometimes, exhibitions in places which are not exhibition spaces can feel a little.....well, wrong. Pieces can feel jarring and look a little out of place. But this place was entirely different. The pieces were meant to be an integral part of the shop so the lines between shop and art were blurry, and it worked really well. And I loved chatting to Becky. She is also an artist and mum, so she knows where I am coming from in terms of still needing to create despite having the pressures of a new little person in my world, and on how it has focused me and frustrated me in equal measure! And I feel more than a little inspired but everything I have seen so far.
I have a little idea brewing....... I never took fine art at University, as I always had a sense that I would not be good enough, or clever enough, or cool enough! Now, I have a small fire inside my belly. I would really like to go to Weston College and study the Applied Art degree that both Becky and Camilla studied. Talking to Becky, it sounds exactly what I need to really focus my art practice, and the thought of immersing myself in an environment where I can totally focus on my art and the artwork of others is deliciously appealing. I worry that I am being selfish even considering it, as it would require lots of sacrifice on both my and Dave's part. I'm not sure I can afford it, I'm not sure I could justify quitting work in order to do it, or to keep on working and have to put Ruby in nursery for 4 days a week to do it. Basically, it is a bit of a logistical nightmare!
But I can't get the thought out of my mind.....
Last weekend was the beginning of the Weston-super-Mare Arts Festival 2009. I was (kind of) involved up at The Quarry as there was an open day with Open Studios and a sculpture trail, but to be honest, it was such a nice day that I spent most of it outside in the sunshine! But I did take Ruby on her first sculpture trail. (although I CAN'T WAIT to take her to see the sculptures at Broomhill)
There are lots of exciting things happening in my hometown art wise over the duration of the festival. On my birthday, I went to meet Camilla at The Mythical Beast Sweet Shoppe. It was lovely to meet her, and, as she wrote on her blog, I too hope we can meet in the not too distant future to drink tea and talk all things art related!
I also met a lovely fellow artist called Becky. Becky runs a little boutique shop in Weston called Frou Frou where another little slice of arts week was taking place. I loved what was happening here. Sometimes, exhibitions in places which are not exhibition spaces can feel a little.....well, wrong. Pieces can feel jarring and look a little out of place. But this place was entirely different. The pieces were meant to be an integral part of the shop so the lines between shop and art were blurry, and it worked really well. And I loved chatting to Becky. She is also an artist and mum, so she knows where I am coming from in terms of still needing to create despite having the pressures of a new little person in my world, and on how it has focused me and frustrated me in equal measure! And I feel more than a little inspired but everything I have seen so far.
I have a little idea brewing....... I never took fine art at University, as I always had a sense that I would not be good enough, or clever enough, or cool enough! Now, I have a small fire inside my belly. I would really like to go to Weston College and study the Applied Art degree that both Becky and Camilla studied. Talking to Becky, it sounds exactly what I need to really focus my art practice, and the thought of immersing myself in an environment where I can totally focus on my art and the artwork of others is deliciously appealing. I worry that I am being selfish even considering it, as it would require lots of sacrifice on both my and Dave's part. I'm not sure I can afford it, I'm not sure I could justify quitting work in order to do it, or to keep on working and have to put Ruby in nursery for 4 days a week to do it. Basically, it is a bit of a logistical nightmare!
But I can't get the thought out of my mind.....
Monday, 21 September 2009
September...
...is officially my favourite month of the year. Not only is it my birthday month, but it seems that September is usually better weather than the entire summer here put together.
Its wonderful when the skies look like this....
But the leaves look like this.
I have little energy right now, and have been feeling a bit poorly recently. However, I have also been on quite a few creative wanderings recently and met some interesting new people, so have much to write about. September also seems to herald new beginnings for me as the season changes, strangely much more so than the new year. My head is full of creative thoughts and plans, which is much better than it being full of the pain of a rather nasty ear infection.....
Here is to new artist friends, blue skies, the beginnings of Autumn and (soon) healthy ears!!
Its wonderful when the skies look like this....
But the leaves look like this.
I have little energy right now, and have been feeling a bit poorly recently. However, I have also been on quite a few creative wanderings recently and met some interesting new people, so have much to write about. September also seems to herald new beginnings for me as the season changes, strangely much more so than the new year. My head is full of creative thoughts and plans, which is much better than it being full of the pain of a rather nasty ear infection.....
Here is to new artist friends, blue skies, the beginnings of Autumn and (soon) healthy ears!!
Thursday, 10 September 2009
My favourite shops are sweet shops...
And on my birthday I'm going to one....
The Mythical Beast Sweet Shoppe is a collaberative exhibition of 20 artists exhibiting work on the theme of mythical beasts. Its being housed in a curious little building overlooking Birnbeck Pier that I have always wondered about but never visited, a ten minute walk from where I live. Its next to Prince Consort Gardens, a lovely little park that I often end up at in order to see the sea, wonderful sunsets and to plot creative endeavours and generally feel inspired. There will be 40 different types of sweets on sale during the exhibition.
I am VERY excited! And hopefully I will get to meet Camilla...
The Mythical Beast Sweet Shoppe is a collaberative exhibition of 20 artists exhibiting work on the theme of mythical beasts. Its being housed in a curious little building overlooking Birnbeck Pier that I have always wondered about but never visited, a ten minute walk from where I live. Its next to Prince Consort Gardens, a lovely little park that I often end up at in order to see the sea, wonderful sunsets and to plot creative endeavours and generally feel inspired. There will be 40 different types of sweets on sale during the exhibition.
I am VERY excited! And hopefully I will get to meet Camilla...
Tuesday, 8 September 2009
Keeping it separate
In light of my word of the year being "Karen", I have created a new blog.
This whole "bring up baby" lark can be all consuming, and I have felt the desire to document it, think about it, write for therapeutic purposes and talk about my experiences, but it didn't feel right for these musings to end up on this blog. This blog is about all things creative in my world, and I kinda want it to stay that way.
So if you are at all interested, you can see my new blog here.
www.meanderingsmusingsandmotherhood.blogspot.com
You don't HAVE to read it, but give it a try? I hope you won't find it dull! Of course, if babies aren't your bag, then just stay here and normal creative service will be resumed.
Don't say I'm pushing you into anything.....
This whole "bring up baby" lark can be all consuming, and I have felt the desire to document it, think about it, write for therapeutic purposes and talk about my experiences, but it didn't feel right for these musings to end up on this blog. This blog is about all things creative in my world, and I kinda want it to stay that way.
So if you are at all interested, you can see my new blog here.
www.meanderingsmusingsandmotherhood.blogspot.com
You don't HAVE to read it, but give it a try? I hope you won't find it dull! Of course, if babies aren't your bag, then just stay here and normal creative service will be resumed.
Don't say I'm pushing you into anything.....
Thursday, 27 August 2009
Betinna Schroeder
Bettina Schroeder
Speaking of working more in textiles.....
I came across this artist while wandering around Totnes when i was there in February, and I completely fell in love with her work. I meant to blog about it, but totally forgot.
I love the way her work is packed with meaning and is extremely thought provoking, and I love love LOVE her use of materials. It is giving me a hankering for getting out my liquid latex again.....
Speaking of working more in textiles.....
I came across this artist while wandering around Totnes when i was there in February, and I completely fell in love with her work. I meant to blog about it, but totally forgot.
I love the way her work is packed with meaning and is extremely thought provoking, and I love love LOVE her use of materials. It is giving me a hankering for getting out my liquid latex again.....
Weston-super-Mare Arts Festival
I am very excited about this years Arts Festival. Firstly, there is a big festival taking place in the Old Town Quarry where I have my studio, with lots of things going on including live painting, open studios and a sculpture exhibition. I am planning on spending as much of the day there as I can, whilst hoping that people don't assume that me breastfeeding Ruby is public is some sort of strange performance art as they wander round the open studios!!
Also, Camilla whose blog I follow is organising three different events throughout the town which I am going to try and get to. There is the other Art in the Quarry event which I hope to get to, where local artists and performers have been asked to create site specific work, an exhibition at Frou Frou of contemporary embroidery and plasterwork, and The Mythical Beast Sweet shoppe, which is open on weekends during the Arts Festival, and is only round the corner from where I live!
I am hoping for good weather so I can get out and about to as many events as possible, and induldge Ruby and (more importantly) myself in some interesting art from local talent. I am particularly looking forward to seeing the embroidery work, I've been looking at some of the exhibits as shown on Camilla's blog. Some of the work is edgy, humorous and RIGHT up my alley, particularly work by this lady I am DEFINATELY a fan!
I am hoping for lots of inspiration. I love to work in mixed media when I paint, and am thinking about how to use textiles, embroidery and texture more in my work, but I am scared at starting as I am lacking in technical skill. hopefully i will be inspired to just start anyway!
Also, Camilla whose blog I follow is organising three different events throughout the town which I am going to try and get to. There is the other Art in the Quarry event which I hope to get to, where local artists and performers have been asked to create site specific work, an exhibition at Frou Frou of contemporary embroidery and plasterwork, and The Mythical Beast Sweet shoppe, which is open on weekends during the Arts Festival, and is only round the corner from where I live!
I am hoping for good weather so I can get out and about to as many events as possible, and induldge Ruby and (more importantly) myself in some interesting art from local talent. I am particularly looking forward to seeing the embroidery work, I've been looking at some of the exhibits as shown on Camilla's blog. Some of the work is edgy, humorous and RIGHT up my alley, particularly work by this lady I am DEFINATELY a fan!
I am hoping for lots of inspiration. I love to work in mixed media when I paint, and am thinking about how to use textiles, embroidery and texture more in my work, but I am scared at starting as I am lacking in technical skill. hopefully i will be inspired to just start anyway!
Monday, 24 August 2009
My Creative Manifesto
With less time on my hands to be creative lately, I decided to focus my mind and come up with some thoughts on how to nurture and encourage my creativity.
And thus was born...... MY CREATIVE MANIFESTO!
I endeavour to.....
1. Stop living my life remotely through Facebook.
2. Set up a "creativity corner" in a quiet area of my flat. Make it entirely MY space. Equip it with inspiring books, postcards, trinkets, pens, journals sketchpads and chocolate. Make time to use this space daily once ruby has gone to bed, even if that is only to sit in it and breathe deeply for a few moments!
3. Have a pad in my creativity corner entirely for the purposes of doodling.
4. Plan my next solo exhibition, even if the reality of it is quite far off!
5. Get up to my studio once a week with Ruby in the sling.
6. Write more letters to friends.
7. Research exhibitions and gigs that are happening locally, and plan to get to some. daydream about the ones I can't get to.
8. Be entirely in the moment with Ruby when I am on my own with her. Be entirely in MY moment when I am alone with MYSELF
9. Make links with local artists.
And thus was born...... MY CREATIVE MANIFESTO!
I endeavour to.....
1. Stop living my life remotely through Facebook.
2. Set up a "creativity corner" in a quiet area of my flat. Make it entirely MY space. Equip it with inspiring books, postcards, trinkets, pens, journals sketchpads and chocolate. Make time to use this space daily once ruby has gone to bed, even if that is only to sit in it and breathe deeply for a few moments!
3. Have a pad in my creativity corner entirely for the purposes of doodling.
4. Plan my next solo exhibition, even if the reality of it is quite far off!
5. Get up to my studio once a week with Ruby in the sling.
6. Write more letters to friends.
7. Research exhibitions and gigs that are happening locally, and plan to get to some. daydream about the ones I can't get to.
8. Be entirely in the moment with Ruby when I am on my own with her. Be entirely in MY moment when I am alone with MYSELF
9. Make links with local artists.
Wednesday, 19 August 2009
Belly Casting
It seems like an eternity ago now, but I forgot to blog about this when I did it.
Heres my belly cast from the end of my pregnancy.
I have some vague ideas of an art piece around this. A couple of years ago I did a scultural piece for the Open Exhibition with Studio Upstairs which was around body image and the media's skewed perception of what is and isn't beautiful or acceptable.
My thoughts are not clear, but I think I want to revisit these ideas, incorporating something to do with my pregnant form. I have never been so comfortable with my body as I was when I was pregnant, and I want to work with ideas around this.
Its always interesting when my work takes me in different directions other than painting. My ideas for my next solo exhibition feel a bit like this. I want to do something that is less about canvasses with the appeal for people to buy, and perhaps more about the content of the exhibition. Exhibiting for exhibitings sake, rather than to try and sell. I am much braver now around this and willing to take more risks with what I show. However, I think this next exhibition may take place in Bristol rather than Weston. Much as I like to shake people up, I'm not sure Weston is quite ready for some of my ideas!! I mean, if people can be freaked out or made indignant by some of my paintings (which are, in my opinion, mostly just colourful abstract imagary!) then heaven knows what they would make of some of my more "out there" ideas!
AH! So many ideas, so little time!
Heres my belly cast from the end of my pregnancy.
I have some vague ideas of an art piece around this. A couple of years ago I did a scultural piece for the Open Exhibition with Studio Upstairs which was around body image and the media's skewed perception of what is and isn't beautiful or acceptable.
My thoughts are not clear, but I think I want to revisit these ideas, incorporating something to do with my pregnant form. I have never been so comfortable with my body as I was when I was pregnant, and I want to work with ideas around this.
Its always interesting when my work takes me in different directions other than painting. My ideas for my next solo exhibition feel a bit like this. I want to do something that is less about canvasses with the appeal for people to buy, and perhaps more about the content of the exhibition. Exhibiting for exhibitings sake, rather than to try and sell. I am much braver now around this and willing to take more risks with what I show. However, I think this next exhibition may take place in Bristol rather than Weston. Much as I like to shake people up, I'm not sure Weston is quite ready for some of my ideas!! I mean, if people can be freaked out or made indignant by some of my paintings (which are, in my opinion, mostly just colourful abstract imagary!) then heaven knows what they would make of some of my more "out there" ideas!
AH! So many ideas, so little time!
Friday, 14 August 2009
6 weeks and reality is returning
So, Ruby is 6 weeks old as of Wednesday this week. Its been a whirlwind of wonderfulness, chaos, adjustment, joy, deliciousness, tears, terror and laughter!
I feel like I am beginning to raise myself back up into the world, blinking in the sunlight, and still feeling a bit dazed and confused. Nothing could have prepared me for this whole experience. Its been crazy-fantastic, full of hard work, worry and unsolicited advice!
I feel like I am in quite a creative mood at the moment, although obviously my time for this is severely limited. I have managed to make it up to my studio to paint 3 times so far, which doesn't sound much, but is a triumph as far as I am concerned! Its interesting to see what having a baby with me has done to my creative practice. An interesting development has come out of having to put Ruby first.... usually I find it hard to stop when I am painting, and I might ruin a canvas by not stopping at the point where the painting was interesting. Now, Ruby forces me to stop at random moments when I have to turn away from the work and turn my attention to feeding her or walking with her to soothe her. And the other day, I was sat down feeding her after stopping mid flow, and I had 20 minutes to just stop and look at my work. I had no choice. And it was GOOD, as I actually put away a painting that I may have ruined by over working.
I have a definate sense of not taking anything for granted anymore, be that my time at the studio, my relationship my husband and my relationships with friends. Things seem much more valuable and feel much more special.
It is a rich and creative period, if very tiring. I have a real sense in my studio of needing to clear out the old and make way for the new.
Its a new beginning in so many senses of the word.
Monday, 6 July 2009
Sunday, 28 June 2009
Today
Taken from Laura's blog..... and today seemed like an appropriate day to do it!!
TODAY
June 28th 2009
Outside my window... Its trying to rain, and I'm hoping for a huge, thundery downpour!
I am thinking... that it is so hard to focus on anything other than the fact that my baby is due TODAY, and that from now onwwards, waiting is going to feel so long.
I am thankful for... spending lots and lots of time with Dave right now before the baby gets here, but that he will be around in the days seeing his baby grow up, because he works from home.
From the kitchen... A hive of activity, due to my nesting need to fill the freezer to the brim! Lasagna, spinich dijon chicken, beef bourganon, beef and ale stew and morrocan lamb tagine this week alone!
I am wearing... my trusty maternity jeans and a floaty top... and feeling very hot.
I am creating... a painting in the kitchen which is really quite different from anything I have done before. I'm not sure I like it, but its more about the making than the end product right now.
I am going... to try and think of productive ways of filling my week next week if nothing happens, so that I am not just wasting time on the internet or feeling bored and restless.
I am reading... hmmmmm.... yes, reading. I have just finished "A spot of bother" by Mark Haddon, and really need to start another one. Think it might be "The Book Thief" by Markus Zusak.
I am hoping... that this time next week I won't be waiting any more!
I am hearing... piano music coming from the front room being played by Dave.
Around the house... is tidier than its EVER been!
One of my favorite things... paint!
A few plans for the rest of the week... Need I state the obvious? You can guess what I'm HOPING the big plan is for the week ahead!
TODAY
June 28th 2009
Outside my window... Its trying to rain, and I'm hoping for a huge, thundery downpour!
I am thinking... that it is so hard to focus on anything other than the fact that my baby is due TODAY, and that from now onwwards, waiting is going to feel so long.
I am thankful for... spending lots and lots of time with Dave right now before the baby gets here, but that he will be around in the days seeing his baby grow up, because he works from home.
From the kitchen... A hive of activity, due to my nesting need to fill the freezer to the brim! Lasagna, spinich dijon chicken, beef bourganon, beef and ale stew and morrocan lamb tagine this week alone!
I am wearing... my trusty maternity jeans and a floaty top... and feeling very hot.
I am creating... a painting in the kitchen which is really quite different from anything I have done before. I'm not sure I like it, but its more about the making than the end product right now.
I am going... to try and think of productive ways of filling my week next week if nothing happens, so that I am not just wasting time on the internet or feeling bored and restless.
I am reading... hmmmmm.... yes, reading. I have just finished "A spot of bother" by Mark Haddon, and really need to start another one. Think it might be "The Book Thief" by Markus Zusak.
I am hoping... that this time next week I won't be waiting any more!
I am hearing... piano music coming from the front room being played by Dave.
Around the house... is tidier than its EVER been!
One of my favorite things... paint!
A few plans for the rest of the week... Need I state the obvious? You can guess what I'm HOPING the big plan is for the week ahead!
Saturday, 27 June 2009
Saturday, 13 June 2009
Studio in crisis
Another important thing that I haven't said much about here is the funding crisis currently being faced by Studio Upstairs, the artists community where i used to volunteer. On my last day at the studio, the announcement was made that unless some major funding was secured, the studio would have to close within 6 months.
I am devastated by this possibility.
Despite not being a volunteer at the studio now, I will always feel part of it and the thought of it closing fills me with horror. It is a vital resource for so many, and full of some of the most creative and inspiring people I know. Since the announcement was made, some funding has been secured which means the studios future is safe until Jan 2010, but despite this, things still hang in the balance. So many exciting exhibitions and fundraising things are planned, so I feel optimistic and hopeful. But if anyone is out there in blogland who wants to support a most worthy charity in any way they can, visit the studio website for more details.
And the next exhibition is an exhibition of postcards for sale...... heres the blurb from the facebook site publicising this.....
As part of our continuing ‘Save Our Studio’ campaign, Studio Upstairs Bristol proudly presents an exciting open submission exhibition at 204 Gloucester Road artspace from June 27 – July 5th
All artists were given a 5"x8" postcard and a free rein – the result is an incredible mixed-media show, with the Bristol art community truly pulling together to show their support for Studio Upstairs.
Artists from Studio Upstairs, Aardman, Spike Island, Jamaica Street Studios, PRSC, Mivart Street Studios and graffiti / street artists from the recent RWA Crimes of Passion show (amongst others) have all got involved - the result is a massive selection of high quality original pieces, all for sale at just £10 - come early and grab a bargain!
I am REALLY hoping to attend the opening, but is firmly in the hands of fate, as it is the day before my baby is meant to make an arrival.....
I am devastated by this possibility.
Despite not being a volunteer at the studio now, I will always feel part of it and the thought of it closing fills me with horror. It is a vital resource for so many, and full of some of the most creative and inspiring people I know. Since the announcement was made, some funding has been secured which means the studios future is safe until Jan 2010, but despite this, things still hang in the balance. So many exciting exhibitions and fundraising things are planned, so I feel optimistic and hopeful. But if anyone is out there in blogland who wants to support a most worthy charity in any way they can, visit the studio website for more details.
And the next exhibition is an exhibition of postcards for sale...... heres the blurb from the facebook site publicising this.....
As part of our continuing ‘Save Our Studio’ campaign, Studio Upstairs Bristol proudly presents an exciting open submission exhibition at 204 Gloucester Road artspace from June 27 – July 5th
All artists were given a 5"x8" postcard and a free rein – the result is an incredible mixed-media show, with the Bristol art community truly pulling together to show their support for Studio Upstairs.
Artists from Studio Upstairs, Aardman, Spike Island, Jamaica Street Studios, PRSC, Mivart Street Studios and graffiti / street artists from the recent RWA Crimes of Passion show (amongst others) have all got involved - the result is a massive selection of high quality original pieces, all for sale at just £10 - come early and grab a bargain!
I am REALLY hoping to attend the opening, but is firmly in the hands of fate, as it is the day before my baby is meant to make an arrival.....
Catching Up
Ok, so I haven't blogged in SUCH a long time, but I think it is fair to say my brain has been engaged elsewhere!!
I have been really trying to focus on ME during the last few months of my pregnancy, but it is hard to focus when all of my energies are being drawn inwards towards the little life that is growing so big in my belly, and all the excitement, worry, fear and happiness that brings. Also, over the past couple of weeks I have found it even harder to think about myself and my creativity, as my baby was locked in a breech position, and I was dealing with issues around this, which I won't go into here, as I don't want to get TOO personal. Safe to say we had a very sucessful if pretty hardcore and traumatic appointment yesterday where my baby was turned. So now I can focus on an active birth, and try and think a bit more about me and my creativity!
Its hard to remember what else has been happening in my world since I last blogged. Arts week totally burned me out and left me unable and extremely unwilling to be in my studio. I went up there a couple of days ago though recently. I only painted for an hour, but it made me feel back in touch with my creative urges, and much more balanced. I am brimming with ideas, but really do need to get rid of all my old paintings that are hanging around. They feel pretty stale now, and are blocking the flow of new ideas. But its kind of hard to do anything about this right now! All I know is that I have a hankering to do an exhibition which is much more about exhibiting for exhibitings sake, rather than to try and flog canvasses. I have some ideas for some much more sculptural work, and feel a new direction coming on. Which is quite exciting. I also have absolutely no idea how long these ideas will take to come to life. Could be a year. Could be many more!! Lets welcome the new arrival into my world and go from there!
I have been really trying to focus on ME during the last few months of my pregnancy, but it is hard to focus when all of my energies are being drawn inwards towards the little life that is growing so big in my belly, and all the excitement, worry, fear and happiness that brings. Also, over the past couple of weeks I have found it even harder to think about myself and my creativity, as my baby was locked in a breech position, and I was dealing with issues around this, which I won't go into here, as I don't want to get TOO personal. Safe to say we had a very sucessful if pretty hardcore and traumatic appointment yesterday where my baby was turned. So now I can focus on an active birth, and try and think a bit more about me and my creativity!
Its hard to remember what else has been happening in my world since I last blogged. Arts week totally burned me out and left me unable and extremely unwilling to be in my studio. I went up there a couple of days ago though recently. I only painted for an hour, but it made me feel back in touch with my creative urges, and much more balanced. I am brimming with ideas, but really do need to get rid of all my old paintings that are hanging around. They feel pretty stale now, and are blocking the flow of new ideas. But its kind of hard to do anything about this right now! All I know is that I have a hankering to do an exhibition which is much more about exhibiting for exhibitings sake, rather than to try and flog canvasses. I have some ideas for some much more sculptural work, and feel a new direction coming on. Which is quite exciting. I also have absolutely no idea how long these ideas will take to come to life. Could be a year. Could be many more!! Lets welcome the new arrival into my world and go from there!
Monday, 18 May 2009
Post North Somerset Arts Week musings
I was involved in North Somerset Arts Week up at the Quarry, with open studios and an exhibition, and although it all ended over a week ago, its only now that I have felt the energy to blog about it.
It really drained me
Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed it too, its good to have people coming in and seeing the work, and this does bring with it a new kind of energy, but I was up there most days and just found it really tiring. Exhibiting, selling and going public with my work is probably the thing I struggle with the most about being a painter. And also, there is something really disconcerting about the fact that putting your stuff on a wall gives people free reign to say WHATEVER they wish. Again, I had lots of positive comments about my work and these were great to hear, but there were a few negatives in there too, and one or two people (you know who you are Vera!!) who gave it to me with both barrels!! I always find this a struggle. I know not everyone will like what I do, and it would be very strange and disagreeable if they did, but if I saw something I don't like when viewing art and the artist was stood right by it, I would never DREAM of being nasty to them about it! When I put my work on a wall, I'm putting up a big piece of myself, so when people dismiss it in such vocal terms, they are (unbeknown to them) directly dismissing ME. However, every time I exhibit, it gets easier I suppose, easier to feed off the positive comments, and easier to put two fingers up to the critics!
Sunday, 3 May 2009
Musings on Identity
I woke up this morning thinking about the subject of identity, and my thoughts have stayed with this for most of the day, so I felt compelled to blog about it!
There are many thoughts connected with my sense of identity at the moment during this transitional period I am in. At the moment, I am neither a viewed as mother, or someone who no longer has children, and it is a bit of a strange no mans land to be in. I don't feel I yet have much in common with those with children and feel the urge to shy away from conversations around babies, yet I miss some of my friends who don't have babies and who already seem to view me as different from them and seperate. It feels a little lonely. And a big issue for me around this is my identity as an artist. I have had so many people tell me that when my baby is born, there is no way I will spend any time up at my studio. If I try and argue my corner with these people, they give me these patronising smiles that imply I am extremely naive and perhaps a little stupid. They OBVIOUSLY know better than me and scoff at my lack of knowledge!! But I AM planning on being at my studio…… I suppose I feel a little insulted when people state with such confidence in themselves that I won’t paint. My art is not a “nice little hobby” it’s an intrinsic part of who I am. Even when I am not actively working, my inner painter is always active, thinking, planning and being inspired. I can’t switch this off, and I feel that the people who are so negative have never felt this compulsion. It comes from the same place I guess as those who say “ooo, painting, that must be nice and relaxing.” You know what? Sometimes it is the biggest struggle of my life to keep painting, sometimes I get stuck, frustrated, angry and feel like I never want to paint again. Sometimes I feel blissful while painting, or in touch with deeper parts of myself that are hard to put into words, or shy, or energetic or a whole host of other things. But relaxing?? No. Never that!
Sometimes I question whether my attitude is selfish by having such a strong need to paint, and viewing it as just as important as taking care of my baby when he or she is here. My inner artist kind of rebels at being a mother, and wants to keep the two identities separate, probably out of fear of being forgotten, lost or diminished. But I know that inevitably these two identities will have to co-exist, and I don’t know at the moment if there will be a clash that pulls me in different directions, or will whether they will merge and compliment each either to enrich my art making in new ways.
Through talking to and reading about other artist mothers, I feel somewhat reassured. On talking about my fears with another painter up at the studio, she reassured me that “the art will call you back”. I am also influenced by Keri Smith, who wrote about her experiences on her blog of how your creativity is impacted by having a child. She speaks honestly about the difficulties (and despite what that doubters think, I KNOW things like lack of sleep and having a child with me will, at times, severly limit what I can do!!) but also the bonuses to ones creativity and inspiration, and she says that she
“believes one of the best gifts I can give to (her baby) is to allow my own creativity to flourish. Not necessarily in the all encompassing way that it did before. Now I have to shrink things down a bit to fit it into the time I have. But it is still a huge part of me and I am excited to share it more with him as he grows…… For me it came down to a question. Not "Will I have a child and still be able to create?", but instead, "Can I live with not having had that experience in my life?" and for me the answer was "no".
So after all my thinking today, I feel galvanised. I know it won’t be easy, but I am prepared to fight for my identity as an artist. I won’t be giving it up, how could I? It would be like giving up breathing, I cannot survive without it!! After all, in reference to my word of the year, my creativity is probably the biggest part of what makes me KAREN.
There are many thoughts connected with my sense of identity at the moment during this transitional period I am in. At the moment, I am neither a viewed as mother, or someone who no longer has children, and it is a bit of a strange no mans land to be in. I don't feel I yet have much in common with those with children and feel the urge to shy away from conversations around babies, yet I miss some of my friends who don't have babies and who already seem to view me as different from them and seperate. It feels a little lonely. And a big issue for me around this is my identity as an artist. I have had so many people tell me that when my baby is born, there is no way I will spend any time up at my studio. If I try and argue my corner with these people, they give me these patronising smiles that imply I am extremely naive and perhaps a little stupid. They OBVIOUSLY know better than me and scoff at my lack of knowledge!! But I AM planning on being at my studio…… I suppose I feel a little insulted when people state with such confidence in themselves that I won’t paint. My art is not a “nice little hobby” it’s an intrinsic part of who I am. Even when I am not actively working, my inner painter is always active, thinking, planning and being inspired. I can’t switch this off, and I feel that the people who are so negative have never felt this compulsion. It comes from the same place I guess as those who say “ooo, painting, that must be nice and relaxing.” You know what? Sometimes it is the biggest struggle of my life to keep painting, sometimes I get stuck, frustrated, angry and feel like I never want to paint again. Sometimes I feel blissful while painting, or in touch with deeper parts of myself that are hard to put into words, or shy, or energetic or a whole host of other things. But relaxing?? No. Never that!
Sometimes I question whether my attitude is selfish by having such a strong need to paint, and viewing it as just as important as taking care of my baby when he or she is here. My inner artist kind of rebels at being a mother, and wants to keep the two identities separate, probably out of fear of being forgotten, lost or diminished. But I know that inevitably these two identities will have to co-exist, and I don’t know at the moment if there will be a clash that pulls me in different directions, or will whether they will merge and compliment each either to enrich my art making in new ways.
Through talking to and reading about other artist mothers, I feel somewhat reassured. On talking about my fears with another painter up at the studio, she reassured me that “the art will call you back”. I am also influenced by Keri Smith, who wrote about her experiences on her blog of how your creativity is impacted by having a child. She speaks honestly about the difficulties (and despite what that doubters think, I KNOW things like lack of sleep and having a child with me will, at times, severly limit what I can do!!) but also the bonuses to ones creativity and inspiration, and she says that she
“believes one of the best gifts I can give to (her baby) is to allow my own creativity to flourish. Not necessarily in the all encompassing way that it did before. Now I have to shrink things down a bit to fit it into the time I have. But it is still a huge part of me and I am excited to share it more with him as he grows…… For me it came down to a question. Not "Will I have a child and still be able to create?", but instead, "Can I live with not having had that experience in my life?" and for me the answer was "no".
So after all my thinking today, I feel galvanised. I know it won’t be easy, but I am prepared to fight for my identity as an artist. I won’t be giving it up, how could I? It would be like giving up breathing, I cannot survive without it!! After all, in reference to my word of the year, my creativity is probably the biggest part of what makes me KAREN.
Saturday, 25 April 2009
Long Time No Post....
Its been ages since I last posted, hasn't it?
My world is a very busy one at the moment, and I suppose much of my energy has been turned inwards and on the very wriggly little life that is growing in me! But there is stuff going on..... I will do seperate posts for some of the current bigger things that are going on, but here is just a snapshot of things from my world that are NOT baby related...
HOLIDAY
We went away for our little jaunt to The Music Room down near South Hams for our wedding anniversary. It was a truely inspiring space, where lots of creative thoughts florished! During the week, we both got VERY sick for a couple of days, which sounds like it should have spoilt the week, but actually didn't at all. OK, so having a winter vomiting bug wasn't great , but what it did force me to do was to slow down almost to a complete halt and really rest, and I was reminded of how this is such a rarity in everyday life. It gave me so much clear thinking time.
I also spent lots of time unhurridly pampering myself in the bathroom... you know, lotions, potions, scrubs and lovely smells! It felt so good to shamelessly devote all that time to myself, not for vanities sake, but just to feel good. More of this sort of thing needs to occur in my everyday life, not just when on holiday. And it is no excuse to say I have no time..... this was another pretty media free week, certainly with no internet, and it occurred to me just how much of my time is taken up with mindless internet use when I could be doing other things. I guess that also explains my lack of posting here, as since my holiday I have spent much less time on the net, and not missed it much either!
MAKING A DEN
I used to love making dens when I was a child.... and it occured to me one night that there was no need for me not to make one just because I am a "grown up". So I made one.... filled it with delicious snacks, inspiring books, my Ipod, some paintings to look at, fairy lights and my journal. It was the best night in I have had in AGES!
BEES IN MY CAR
I haven't seen any bees in ages.... I heard there was a world wide honey shortage a while ago due to lack of bees. And then one day, driving along, I realised one was buzzing away in the back trying to get out. I parked up to let it out, opened my boot, and two more flew out. How odd. What were 3 bees doing in my car??
I will stop going off on tangents now and bring this post to a close. But I am back, and will post more soon about what else is happening in my world...
My world is a very busy one at the moment, and I suppose much of my energy has been turned inwards and on the very wriggly little life that is growing in me! But there is stuff going on..... I will do seperate posts for some of the current bigger things that are going on, but here is just a snapshot of things from my world that are NOT baby related...
HOLIDAY
We went away for our little jaunt to The Music Room down near South Hams for our wedding anniversary. It was a truely inspiring space, where lots of creative thoughts florished! During the week, we both got VERY sick for a couple of days, which sounds like it should have spoilt the week, but actually didn't at all. OK, so having a winter vomiting bug wasn't great , but what it did force me to do was to slow down almost to a complete halt and really rest, and I was reminded of how this is such a rarity in everyday life. It gave me so much clear thinking time.
I also spent lots of time unhurridly pampering myself in the bathroom... you know, lotions, potions, scrubs and lovely smells! It felt so good to shamelessly devote all that time to myself, not for vanities sake, but just to feel good. More of this sort of thing needs to occur in my everyday life, not just when on holiday. And it is no excuse to say I have no time..... this was another pretty media free week, certainly with no internet, and it occurred to me just how much of my time is taken up with mindless internet use when I could be doing other things. I guess that also explains my lack of posting here, as since my holiday I have spent much less time on the net, and not missed it much either!
MAKING A DEN
I used to love making dens when I was a child.... and it occured to me one night that there was no need for me not to make one just because I am a "grown up". So I made one.... filled it with delicious snacks, inspiring books, my Ipod, some paintings to look at, fairy lights and my journal. It was the best night in I have had in AGES!
BEES IN MY CAR
I haven't seen any bees in ages.... I heard there was a world wide honey shortage a while ago due to lack of bees. And then one day, driving along, I realised one was buzzing away in the back trying to get out. I parked up to let it out, opened my boot, and two more flew out. How odd. What were 3 bees doing in my car??
I will stop going off on tangents now and bring this post to a close. But I am back, and will post more soon about what else is happening in my world...
Friday, 6 February 2009
And it keeps on snowing...
These pictures were taken today up at the Quarry where I have my studio..... it looked beautiful. Its just a shame that the actual reality of snow round here is that it quickly goes slushy and brown and walking in it makes me feel like i am going to fall over any minute!!
I wanted to paint up at the studio as I have a couple of paintings on the go that I really am into, but it was just WAY too cold. Think I'm going to spend the night tucked up in the flat. I'm feeling creative though, so think I am going to move away from the computer for now and think about how I can fulfil my desire for creating.....
A hot bubble bath is my first point of call!
I wanted to paint up at the studio as I have a couple of paintings on the go that I really am into, but it was just WAY too cold. Think I'm going to spend the night tucked up in the flat. I'm feeling creative though, so think I am going to move away from the computer for now and think about how I can fulfil my desire for creating.....
A hot bubble bath is my first point of call!
Tuesday, 3 February 2009
Snowy day
It sends Britain a bit bonkers when we have extreme weather condidtions, but I had to love todays snow. It NEVER snows where I live usually...... but today was
beautiful!
beautiful!
Back from the wilderness....
My media fast is over and I am back in the world of the internet!
I will own up straigh away and say that my week wasn't completely media free. I ended up watching tele round at a friends house, but this was OK, as there was also plenty of conversation! I also had to jump on the net a few times as i had a work related mini-disaster (I lost the work camera cable!)and had to order something to replace it, so this required some internet time. Th last thing was that I ended up looking at Facebook for about 2 minutes, but I WAS looking at pics of my friends new born baby, so again, I give myself that one!
All in all, I managed it! It was a pretty busy week work wise for various reasons, so this proved a distraction. One thing I did find was that I find it incredibly difficult to just do nothing. For the first couple of evenings I felt quite restless, and needed to fill my evening, even if that was with creative stuff! So I learnt that i need to make more of an effort to rest and reflect. I did feel the pull to put the tele on a few times, as I guess I associate this with relaxation and (ironically) switching off.
The positive things that came out of the week were that we cooked more, we talked more, and we had a weekend of relaxing and doing things, rather than just wasting the time. We even managed to sit down and make a real plan that will help our finances. Some big decisions were made, yet the solution seemed so obvious. All we needed was some space to come up with it, and when time is being filled by media distraction, maybe the time is just not there. Its amazing what a bit of thinking time can do and the clarity it can bring!
I don't think I could ever totally cut media from my life, but I certainly plan to do this more often. After the week I felt lighter, clearer, inspired and motivated!
here's to the next "unplugged" time, its so important. I feel reconnected a bit mpre with the big wide world around me.
I will own up straigh away and say that my week wasn't completely media free. I ended up watching tele round at a friends house, but this was OK, as there was also plenty of conversation! I also had to jump on the net a few times as i had a work related mini-disaster (I lost the work camera cable!)and had to order something to replace it, so this required some internet time. Th last thing was that I ended up looking at Facebook for about 2 minutes, but I WAS looking at pics of my friends new born baby, so again, I give myself that one!
All in all, I managed it! It was a pretty busy week work wise for various reasons, so this proved a distraction. One thing I did find was that I find it incredibly difficult to just do nothing. For the first couple of evenings I felt quite restless, and needed to fill my evening, even if that was with creative stuff! So I learnt that i need to make more of an effort to rest and reflect. I did feel the pull to put the tele on a few times, as I guess I associate this with relaxation and (ironically) switching off.
The positive things that came out of the week were that we cooked more, we talked more, and we had a weekend of relaxing and doing things, rather than just wasting the time. We even managed to sit down and make a real plan that will help our finances. Some big decisions were made, yet the solution seemed so obvious. All we needed was some space to come up with it, and when time is being filled by media distraction, maybe the time is just not there. Its amazing what a bit of thinking time can do and the clarity it can bring!
I don't think I could ever totally cut media from my life, but I certainly plan to do this more often. After the week I felt lighter, clearer, inspired and motivated!
here's to the next "unplugged" time, its so important. I feel reconnected a bit mpre with the big wide world around me.
Sunday, 25 January 2009
As Jack Bauer would say..... I'm going dark
Right.
About to switch the computer off.
And not come back to it for a whole week. (apart from the one necessary EBay exploration!) Or the television for that matter....
Wish me luck, and see you on the other side, hopefully with lots of nice photos of all the creative things I have done in the week!
About to switch the computer off.
And not come back to it for a whole week. (apart from the one necessary EBay exploration!) Or the television for that matter....
Wish me luck, and see you on the other side, hopefully with lots of nice photos of all the creative things I have done in the week!
Saturday, 24 January 2009
Studio Upstairs review...
...took place this Thursday.
I really loved it! It was amazing to see so much of my work on the wall all in one place, its not often that I get to examine everything (well, a large chunk of stuff anyways!) and see all the links, occasional differences, themes and the way it all slots together. It was quite a process sorting out what was going up and what didn't make it, and I needed help with this to make sure I didn't just put in polished, finished pieces but included some less finished and often, more interesting ones. At first, when I was putting the work up with the help of the other volunteer, we were being really particualr about placement of work..... after three hours of this, we soon got to the stage of just slapping things up where there was space!! And then I had to speak about my work. I felt surprisingly relaxed about this, not nervous at all really, which I think is testament to the supportiveness of the studio environment as much as anything else. I was worried nobody would engage with me or ask questions, but they did. Other peoples responses, reactions and questions at times made me view my work in a different light, and it was great to talk about it and feel really proud of what I do. I managed to speak for nearly an hour and a half with all the audience participaton that came my way, which really surprised me!
It was a great experience, and a fitting way to round off my time at the Studio.
One more week to go......
>
I really loved it! It was amazing to see so much of my work on the wall all in one place, its not often that I get to examine everything (well, a large chunk of stuff anyways!) and see all the links, occasional differences, themes and the way it all slots together. It was quite a process sorting out what was going up and what didn't make it, and I needed help with this to make sure I didn't just put in polished, finished pieces but included some less finished and often, more interesting ones. At first, when I was putting the work up with the help of the other volunteer, we were being really particualr about placement of work..... after three hours of this, we soon got to the stage of just slapping things up where there was space!! And then I had to speak about my work. I felt surprisingly relaxed about this, not nervous at all really, which I think is testament to the supportiveness of the studio environment as much as anything else. I was worried nobody would engage with me or ask questions, but they did. Other peoples responses, reactions and questions at times made me view my work in a different light, and it was great to talk about it and feel really proud of what I do. I managed to speak for nearly an hour and a half with all the audience participaton that came my way, which really surprised me!
It was a great experience, and a fitting way to round off my time at the Studio.
One more week to go......
>
Tuesday, 20 January 2009
Making time
I often feel that I wish I had more time for things I enjoy, and not just work, chores etc. It feels like I never have enough time. However, when I really examine what I do with my spare time, a great deal of it is wasted. I have a bit of an internet addiction, but its never for anything exciting. I work mainly all day on a computer, then I get home and often spend half the evening on the internet, looking at Facebook, ebay and a chat forum I am part of. Its such a waste of time and I end up feeling guilty, but it has become an addiction, it is an easy way to fill up my hours and fill up my brain. But it is like fast food..... easy, instantly gratifying, but ultimately bad for you and fills you with bad stuff.
So, I am going to tackle this head on and do something I have been meaning to do for a while...... I am going to have a media fast.
THE RULES
For one week, starting from Monday 26th January....
1. I will not use the internet or the computer AT ALL when I return from work. (necessity means I HAVE to use a computer at work, but this period of my day does not count, only my spare time.)
2. I will not watch television of any kind, including DVD's.
3. I will make sure my mobile phone is on silent in the evening, and I will check it only once. (this will not prove hard, I am not really a mobile phone kind of girl, and I tend to do this anyway)
4. I will not read any magazines or newspapers.
5. I will visit the library at least once.
6. Books are allowed
7. Music is allowed
8. Talking on the telephone (not mobile though!) is allowed, as long as I am calling up old friends for a chat.
There will be one small concession to this which I will own up to, I will be checking my eBay account on Tuesday as I have a load of sales coming to an end! I did consider not starting the media fast until the week after because of this, but I feel if I don't do it while I am thinking about it, I will lose momentum again. (and it will be a nice surprise to see how much things sell for, rather than my usual thing of checking it half a dozen times every day!)
I am hoping to do this more often, maybe having one week a month with no media, or one night a week. We will see how it goes. I am already thinking about what I am going to do, and I am going to start with doing some of the creativity exercises from this book by Keri Smith. I love this book and always read it when I feel the need to be inspried. It has loads of creative exercises which I would love to do but then tell myself I have no time for. So next week, I will be making time.
Randomly, I also like the idea of setting up our small tent in the lounge and camping out in it one evening.
Wish me luck with all of this! Even more randomly, I am off to make an origami crane before I go to bed. Always wanted to learn how to do this, but never found the time.......
So, I am going to tackle this head on and do something I have been meaning to do for a while...... I am going to have a media fast.
THE RULES
For one week, starting from Monday 26th January....
1. I will not use the internet or the computer AT ALL when I return from work. (necessity means I HAVE to use a computer at work, but this period of my day does not count, only my spare time.)
2. I will not watch television of any kind, including DVD's.
3. I will make sure my mobile phone is on silent in the evening, and I will check it only once. (this will not prove hard, I am not really a mobile phone kind of girl, and I tend to do this anyway)
4. I will not read any magazines or newspapers.
5. I will visit the library at least once.
6. Books are allowed
7. Music is allowed
8. Talking on the telephone (not mobile though!) is allowed, as long as I am calling up old friends for a chat.
There will be one small concession to this which I will own up to, I will be checking my eBay account on Tuesday as I have a load of sales coming to an end! I did consider not starting the media fast until the week after because of this, but I feel if I don't do it while I am thinking about it, I will lose momentum again. (and it will be a nice surprise to see how much things sell for, rather than my usual thing of checking it half a dozen times every day!)
I am hoping to do this more often, maybe having one week a month with no media, or one night a week. We will see how it goes. I am already thinking about what I am going to do, and I am going to start with doing some of the creativity exercises from this book by Keri Smith. I love this book and always read it when I feel the need to be inspried. It has loads of creative exercises which I would love to do but then tell myself I have no time for. So next week, I will be making time.
Randomly, I also like the idea of setting up our small tent in the lounge and camping out in it one evening.
Wish me luck with all of this! Even more randomly, I am off to make an origami crane before I go to bed. Always wanted to learn how to do this, but never found the time.......
Sunday, 18 January 2009
End of an era
My thoughts at the moment are mainly focused on my last few weeks at Studio Upstairs, an artists community for people with mental health difficulties. I have been a volunteer artist at the studio now since October 2005, but my time there is coming to an end. I decided a while back that it was time to move on from the studio in order to devote more time and attention to my own studio at The Quarry. When people leave, they often have a review of their work up in order to see the development and focus on how the art has moved and changed during their time at the studio. So that it what I am preparing for, as my review is this Thursday! I am amazed at the sheer volume of work I have amassed, and my biggest headache is going to be how to condense it to give a good representation of my work. The space I have to hang in is pretty big, but then, so is a lot of my work! Its been interesting and surprisingly emotional getting out all of my old stuff.... there was so much I had forgotten about. I am feeling daunted, nervous, but also incredibly excited. I am planning on taking lots of photos of the review, so they will of course be up here soon!
I feel sad, as the studio has been a massive part of my life for so long and it will be a wrench to leave. I have met so many amazing, funny, interesting, courageous and inspiring people. My stereotypes of mental health have been challenged and broken down, and I am leaving behind lots of friends..... but I feel privileged to have been part of it, and its time for the future, and to focus on all the changes ahead in my year. Exciting times!!
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