Monday 31 December 2007

Monday 24 December 2007

Christmas Musings

Its Christmas Eve today, and it will soon be time to reflect on the year that has gone by. I can't believe the difference between where I was last year and where I am now. And its also our 10 year anniversary, so another time for reflection. (and bucks fizz for breakfast!)

HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

Monday 3 December 2007

When you are the moon......

Scrapping like a mad woman

After attending my first ever crop a few weeks back, I have been doing lots of scrapping. Got right into it last night to the point it was hrd to switch off and go to bed! I ended up doing some digital layouts on publisher, which, for a beginner, I was pretty pleased with! Here one, theres another which is being put together as we speak, so again, watch this space!

Media Fast

In the interests of keeping healthy in all aspects of life (and because I am tired of the amount of crap on Facebook and my general zombie style use of the internet!) me and Dave went on a media fast for a week. That meant no TV or internet after 6pm. OK, so it wasn't the whole hog, but it was enough to convince me it is well worth doing, and something to be encouraged for the future. We got so much more done, had so many more conversations, and a SERIOUS ball began to roll in terms of our future plans (secret as of yet, but watch this space, and NO, it isn't me getting pregnant.....)

Sunday 18 November 2007

In my language

On Friday, I co-facilitated training for frontline staff working with autism. One of the things I came across through being recommended by my collegues on the challenging behaviour team was this video made by Amanda Baggs. Amanda has autism, and made this video to communicate how she feels about the way she can be viewed.

Its amazing, and made me cry at the end.

If you are watching it, bear with it. The first part of the film will initially be strange, perhaps you might find it amusing, or difficult to watch. But the second half of this film simply MUST be watched in the context of the first section. There is not much more I can say, as the film says it all in a way much better than I ever could. But if anyone ever doubts why I do the work i do, watch this film. Or just watch it anyway.

ITS IMPORTANT

Thursday 8 November 2007

Validation

Had the best kind of validation of my artwork today.....

Michelle spoke to me about the effect seeing my exhibition has had on members of the groups she runs. The first one came with one woman who told her she was inspired to create something similar to "white noise" as she had been so interested in it. The second was a woman who apparently was really struck by the 2 paintings entitled "Dissociative Episode", both the paintings themselves and the titles.























It particular woman has had a label put on her of having a dissociative disorder, to it is easy to see why my work resonated with her! Apparently, the woman was never terribly expressive in her art therapy sessions, doing lots of glass painting and making cards. Her art therapist told Michelle of the change in her since she saw my work. She spoke about the two paintings at length, and then went on to create lots of free and expressive paintings that explored her personal stuff.

WHAT AN AMAZING FEELING!! There has been loads of artists work in the past that have inspired me or made me admire them, but to think that I have done the same thing for other people? To be on the other side of this? They are not feelings that can easily be put into words, but is an incredible validation. All I ever wanted was to move someone with my work, to provoke strong emotions, rather than just have them think my work "pretty". And I have done it.

I HAVE DONE IT! The painting bug is now well and truely alive! And its all down to what happened at the beginning of the year. I had to really look hard at myself and work to create a life I wanted.

Its happening......

Rising Star.....

Got into the studio today and Lucy came straight up to me. She told me that Nick had phoned first thing as he wanted to thank me for the success of the Making It Up workshop. He was apparently thrilled it had gone so well and wanted to thank me in person, so I was a bit sad I missed the call!

But then Lucy said this to me.......

"Your star is rising Karen! Its so great to see, and you are amazing!!

What a fantastic thing to hear, and coming from someone who I admire and think is fab, even better!

Wednesday 7 November 2007

My first ever crop.......

Amd no, Im not talking about my hair!

More text to follow

Made it up

WHAT A BUZZ!!!

The workshop went fantastically! We were at capacity, and were well supported by members from the studio, which meant a great deal to me. Have been in the studio today, and have had lots of positive feedback, which, on the back of all the positive feedback from the exhibition feels wonderful!!

Had a really nice moment with many when we were coming out of the Arnolfini after the workshop had finished. We were laden up with stuff, and you could see people looking at us, thinking "ooooo, they must be artists!" We laughed at it at first, and then we both agreed that that IS what we are! The "artist" label that I have struggled with achieving and then using to describe myself is sitting easier and easier these days......

Post Exhibition Musings

We took the exhibition down on Sunday. It was weird, it came down so quickly, and then it was all over. Felt a bit sad I guess. The exhibition had been such a massive part of my life (if only for a month!) and it felt like the gallery was not my territory anymore once the walls were blank and empty again..... I feel i need to keep my connection with the gallery though, as who knows where it could lead me in the future.

Overall, the exhibition was a MASSIVE success. I ended up selling 11 pieces, the best sale being to a stranger who ended up buying not one but TWO paintings. That always feels like major validation when your work is appreciated on its merit alone. I also had my 15 minutes of fame with lots of local press coverage. Apparently my interview was broadcast on Star radio (althought, thankfully, I never heard it!) and this picture appeared in the Weston mercury with a write up.





















SO am now wondering where the next exhibition opportunities and sales will come from, and what direction my work will take now..... literally watch this space! And I must remember to put together my visitors book/scrapbook.....

And where to start? With a Wedding?

As I said, these last few months have been huge! Some major events have happened, and I guess I am only just beginning to reflect on them. So what better place to reflect than here?!

Mums wedding took place on Thursday 25th of October. I must admit that I had lots of mixed feelings leading up to the wedding, not because I don't like Phil, but just because I was experiencing lots of stirred up emotion connected with my Daddy..... but thats another story and one that I won't go into here as the emotion is private. But put it this way, i managed to exorcise a lot of this feeling the night before with a large glass of vodka!

And then the day came..... and it was wonderful. I thought Mum looked beautiful and radiant, and all the photos show just how happy she is! I thought I was going to lose it during the music when the West Side Story track was played, and I did a little, but managed to hold it together enough to do my reading, which, again was lovely and very emotional.

You are my husband
You are my wife
My feet shall run because of you
My feet shall dance because of you
My heart shall beat because of you
My eyes see because of you
My mind thinks because of you
And I shall love because of you.


The day proved to be cathartic in terms of welcoming Phil into the family. I think he is great, but it has also been a period of adjustment having someone new around.

I also managed to do a speech at the reception, where I was able to say all of these things too. It felt good.

And here are a few of my favourite snaps from the day......







Wednesday 31 October 2007

Making it up

I can't believe that all the big things are drawing to a close..... The exhibition is nearly over, and I still haven't managed to blog about mums wedding yet! Expect some big posts soon! However, just thought I would share this..... Its pretty major, but has amazingly got a bit lost in all the other busy-ness of my life!


Monday 15 October 2007

Food for thought......

Recently all of my posting has mainly been about exhibition stuff and my transistion into a "thirtysomething"......

But this was too important not to post.


Sunday 7 October 2007

Post Opening Night musings.....

Well, its fair to say that the opening night was a resounding success.... sold 8 paintings and made over £1000!!! It was an AMAZING feeling...... pretty stressful before everyone arrived, but I soon warmed up, got into my stride with the whole "meet and greet" thing and ebjoyed myself immensely! I never dreamt that I would sell that many, and if I manage to sell any more during the three weeks of exhibition time, then thats an amazing bonus.

Its been a pretty intense ride......and it feels strange to not have to disappear into my studio room to finish off paintings! It was soooooo much hard work, but I feel immensely proud of what i have achieved! It was a real buzz to see all the work on the wall, and I realised how much I had learnt about curating exhibitions from working at the studio. I also had a couple of emotional moments when thinking about how I am able to make money from something I LOVE doing..... its hard to put myself out there as my paintings can be intensely personal, but I have got a taste of exhibiting now, and i doubt this will be the last one I do. I'm interested to see what direction i take myself off in next, but this feels like is the pinacle of a year where the word I wanted to live by was "create"......














Monday 1 October 2007

Tuesday 25 September 2007

The Big 30

Not much to say about being 30 yet..... my feet have hardly touched the ground!!

Well, as I mentioned, Prince was FANTASTIC!! Then commenced lots of feasting at various local restaurants, and then on Saturdat just gone I had the Vicars and Nuns party at the flat. And I had such a good time! you know those legendary nights that people talk about for years to come? Well, my party was one of those nights and I WAS THE HOSTESS!! YAY!! It was so good to have Duck there, Dom played tunes of sheer brilliance, the fancy dress prize presentation was hllarious and I danced myself silly!!! So many good memories, and so many great photos! I felt very appreciated, and I also appreciated my friends as ALL of them made the effort to dress up, and frankly, some of the efforts were unreal!!!

So now, the 30th celebrations are drawing to a close. (apart from pampering at Cedar Falls tomorrow...yum!) Its now all systems go and then some for the exhibtion as there is less than 2 weeks to go (yikes!)

All that remains to be done is to make this post visual............













Monday 24 September 2007

His Royal Purple Highness

So my birthday celebrations kicked off in considerable style with tickets to see prince playing at the O2 arena in London!

OH.....MY........FRICKIN..............GOD! It was amazing! So many hits, I danced my arse off and sung at the top of my lungs! The atmosphere was incredible! Without a shadow of a doubt, this was the best gig I have EVER been to! here is the setlist of justice and joy!

Let's Go Crazy
1999
I Feel For You
Controversy (with Housequake chant)
Shhh
Musicology (incl the line "Elton John gonna be there...you got to..call him!")
Prince & The Band
All Blues Miles Davis
What A Wonderful World Louis Armstrong (including a line from the Elton song 'Your Song')

Prince solo piano set
Little Red Corvette
I Would Die 4 U
Under The Cherry Moon (instrumental)
Love Is A Losing Game Amy Winehouse (shared vocals with Shelby J.)
Satisfied
Diamonds & Pearls
The Beautiful Ones
Sometimes It Snows In April (OH MY!!)

Full Band
Cream
U Got The Look
Take Me With U
Guitar
Kiss
Purple Rain

Encore
Long & Winding Road (with Elton John) The Beatles
Crazy / Can't Get You Out Of My Head Gnarls Barkely/Kylie Minogue (Shelby J. vocal)
Nothing Compares 2 U
If I Was Your Girlfriend

Encore
Synth set
Bennie & The Jets' edit Elton John - Nasty Girl (sample) - Sign 'O' The Times - Soft & Wet (sample) - When Doves Cry - Alphabet Street - DMSR - Darling Nikki intro - Raspberry Beret

Encore
A Love Bizarre
Chelsea Rodgers

Sunday 23 September 2007

Back to reality

The 30th birthday celebrations have finally drawn to a close. Prince was AWESOME! My party was LEGENDARY! Duckies visit was SPLENDID and as wild as ever! And Im exhausted after 3 hours sleep and preparing for a return to work tomorrow, only been off 5 days but feels like much longer as I have been in such a different world! I'm too tired to write about it all here, maybe now need some post 30 reflections! But hey! 30 is OK and nothing to be afraid of!!

Ok, off to bed to prepare for the return to the world of work..... and watch this space for some very visual posts concerning the birthday celebrations..... until then, heres a picture to be going on with!

Back to reality!!

Tuesday 11 September 2007

Musings on then and now

Forgive my rambings..... it must be my age!























Was looking back at some old photos of me at roughly 19 or 20, and comparing them with photos of me now, soon before turning 30 (did I mention.....) In some photos I don't think I look much different, but in others I feel like I look completely different..... I wish I had noticed how GREAT my legs were at 20, but I REALLY should have plucked my eyebrows sooner!! Other than that and a few extra wrinkles, not too different!

I feel strangely protective and maternal towards the 19 year old in my photo. Maybe its all about what I'm reading into it, but she looks so young! Theres lots of things I think I would like to have told her. I would tell her that things eventually would turn out OK with Dad. I would tell her it was not her fault and there is no more she could have done. I would tell her its going to be painful, but it will feel better, but I would have told her to MAKE SURE she made time to tell him what she thought before he died.
I think I would tell her to travel while she was REALLY free.
I would tell her to dance as much as she can as wildly as she can while she still really enjoys nightclubs!! And I would tell her that ITS SO UNIMPORTANT if people think she looks silly as long as she is enjoying it!
I would tell her to MAKE SURE she went to that Bjork gig at the Opera house.....
I would tell her not to worry, you will pass your driving test eventually and to take particular pleasure in daydreaming and staring out of the window while she is still the passenger.
I would tell her that when the doctor told her it was gastric reflux, she should really ask for a second opinion.....
I would tell her to be more adventurous with her hair...... it will grow back!
I would tell her its perfectly OK not to have a career..... a job and a happy homelife is all that is needed. And I would tell her to tell people she was a painter when asked "what she did for a living"
I would hug her for all the times when it hurt too much too think clearly.....
I would tell her tequila is REALLY NOT A GOOD IDEA.....
I would tell her about the flat who are about to adopt her, and to hang on in there untill then....
I would tell her to be very wary indeed when it came to unresolved father figure issues....
I would tell her not to let mum get on that rickshaw in china....
I would tell her its probably not a good idea to get pet frogs....
I would tell her to take more risks.
I would tell her, in general, overall, to be more careful with mobile phones....

I would tell her to make the most of those GREAT legs while they are still great...

But most of all i would tell her not to do anything differently! I look back at the mistakes I have made, the fantastic times I have had, the terrible times that have been, but apart from the odd thing, I wouldn't change anything. I much prefer the picure of me at 29. I look happier and more confortable with myself. Which is something I am. All my experiences both good and bad have led me to this point. And I'm happy! I may grieve a little for the twentysomething I am about to leave behind, but I look forward to the thirtysomething I am about to become, because this thirtysomething is much more relaxed, content and comfortable in her skin, even if there is a bit more flesh on it and its a bit more wrinkly! I look forward to the future, its the next chapter....

30? Im ready........

262,800 Hours

Thats how old I will be on Thursday. Not sure if it sounds better or not.........

Monday 10 September 2007

Transitions

So, I turn 30 in 3 days. And I'm waiting for my epiphany moment, my moment of enlightenment that will neatly sum up how I feel about moving out of my twenties and into my thirties. Thing is, I'm finding it really hard to get a handle on how I am feeling, because I suppose I am trying to force some sort of emotional reaction to it all. Im also really busy with the exhibition and thinking about the best ways to celebrate the event, so reflection and musings are not being given much energy!

I do feel a bit reflective, even if its hard to gain any deeper insight! Its been a real year of change so far, other people are changing around me, and things have changed and shifted in my life. Getting my new job has made me realise what a big part of my life being at William Knowles has been, and its hard to be letting go of it, even if I know its been positive and for the best! Im in a transition period. I'm seeing where the new job is taking me, but aware that other things like starting a family and working on my art will being to take precedence as I move into my thirties.

I feel like with all the change that has happened recently, things are still up in the air, and I have a feeling that the first year of being thirty will be about seeing where everything settles when they come back down.

Also, the exhibition is a great metaphor for where I feel I am. I have been frantically finishing off canvasses so that all my work is at a point of completion, but after the exhibition, I will be facing lots of new blank canvasses and seeing what direction I am taken in. This feels true of whats to come in my life. I kind of know where I want to be, but don't really know how I'm going to get there or what things will look like when they are finished.

Its exciting and scary all rolled into one, but I don't think I would want to feel any different......

Going Public

The exhibition is proving to be a lot of work! I guess I haven't had time to feel particulary nervous or even excited about it yet, as I have been so busy getting stuff done....

And here is one thing I have decided on...... this is going to be on the front of the all the invitations I will be sending out.

Sunday 2 September 2007

Solo Show Booked

Can't back out now...... solo show is booked. Its going to be on from 5th to 26th October.

Quite scared now. Bring on a month now of frantic painting, publicity stuff and general panic mode.....

Saturday 11 August 2007

Fun with Macro....



















Im not normally one for photos of flowers, but I was experiementing with the macro on my camera, so forgive me! I have to say though, I must have taken a million pictures of the orange flowers against the bright blue sky, as I was so taken by the colour combination. As I was dropping off to sleep one night, I had a vision of a paiting pop into my head which was blue and orange in colour on a white background. These are colours that i don't normally work with, and initially I could not work out where the vision had come from..... then I saw the flowers again the next day, and knew straight away.......

Watch this space for the painting when I have completed it!

I love camping because.......
















Its fantastic hanging out with friends, drinking wine from plastic cups, being in the wilderness and having no agenda other than to relax and have fun. I love being able to get up and dive straight into having a cup of tea in my PJ's and in the fresh air. I love the feeling of contentment and relaxation that quickly takes over. I love being reminded that I AM an outdoors kind of girl.....
















I love not having to worry remotely about what I look like. I love putting my hair in plaits and a headband, and then not worrying for the rest of the day if it is out of place! I love that everything is stripped back to basics..... all you have to worry about is sleeping, eating and drinking lots of red wine!
















I love cooking on an open fire. I also love sitting around late into the night by the light of the fire chatting and putting the world to rights.
















I love being in the outdoors, especially if its by the sea, which is my favourite place to be in the world. I love being able to paddle my feet in the sea, and revel in the sound of the waves and the feel of the sand and water between my toes.





















I especially love swimming in the sea.......
















And staying on a beech theme....... I love barbeques on an empty beach whilst watching the sun go down.....






















Thanks to Kirty and Dom for introducing us to Shell Island and for providing such excellent company! We had the best holiday, and hope this is not the end of the suummer camping experiences....